Saw a picture that was taken of Zac today with a beer in his hand, hanging out with his most important people (his friends) and I felt really good about this marriage ending. 

I am so lucky to have the support system that I have.  I don't know what I would do with out my wonderful siblings.  They are constantly checking on me to make sure that I am okay.  Which is awesome, because I am not usually okay. Their support is amazing. My parents are so great, they want me to be happy so bad.  They just want to make everything okay for me.  Last weekend was terrible, Zac kept the kids at home and I left.  I bawled the whole weekend and had to listen to my MIL tell me that she would like to slap us both.  Some friends of my parents who I have know and loved while growing up, told me to get myself over to their house to stay and they were serious.  It was so nice. 

I would like to get off this crazy emotional roller-coaster. Please.

Sad-Happy-Sad-Happy-Angry-Confused-More Confused-Angry- Sad.   Getting Divorced is like a really long episode of PMS!

Here I go!

You may look at my previous posts and wonder, "What the HELL happened?"  Well, guess what?  I don't know either.  One day I thought we were happy and the next he didn't want to be married anymore.  So, now I am a soon to be ex-stay-at-home mom trying desperately to find a job, in an area with no jobs!  College degree seems to not mean much anymore and the years I spent helping build up his career doesn't either.  I sound bitter.  Well, maybe I am today.  Tomorrow, I might be sad or humiliated or angry.  Who knows?  I don't. 

Mostly I feel bad for my sweet children, who are so wonderful they don't deserve this in their lives.  I wanted better for them, I wanted them to have the whole world.  I feel like they got ripped off, this wasn't how it was supposed to be.  Yet, this is how it is and I guess I will just pull myself together and go on.

Las Vegas

Zac and I went to Las Vegas for Vision Expo West. I spent money while he earned it. Great trade-off. =)

We saw Phantom of the Opera, which I enjoyed Zac did not. Although we FROZE, it was soooooo cold. Zac took his jacket off and we shared that. A peddler with sweatshirts and blankets would make a fortune in there. I felt like it was January and I was watching a football game. Sheesh!

We also saw Mystere, we both loved it! Although I'm not entirely sure what the whole thing with the baby was.

I also spent my time taking pictures of crazily dressed people and didn't take any pictures of things we saw or did. One nice person was kind enough to take this picture for us. You can decide if we belong in the crazily dressed people file.

Orlando

SO my posts are out of chronological order. Ooops. We went to Orlando in July 2011. It was HOT and MUGGY and RAINY and we LOVED every second of it. It wasn't a real well planned trip. Zac bought an airline ticket to go for work, then I decided I wanted to go with him, then Zac's mom and step-dad decided they wanted to go and they would fly the kids with them. We were all on different planes and we didn't really schedule enough time. It was a jam packed 6 days. We would sleep in then hit the parks and go until super late. We had great luck hitting lines short, and got to ride almost everyride with very little wait time. The kids loved meeting the characters, especially Evie.

Dominican Republic

We went to paradise, sans kids. I hate to not take kids with us when we travel but, this was wonderful. I got to relax. Usually I spend the whole time freaking out, so this was a nice change. So instead of running kids to the bathroom, trying to keep them from drowning, finding them food, and all the other assorted craziness of traveling with kids; I got to sit by the pool/ocean and sleep. If you don't have children you wouldn't understand the wonderfulness of this but it was INCREDIBLE!

That is me on a parasail. Zac is scared of heights. I kept wondering when the killer whale was going to jump out of the water and eat me.

We got on the scuba-diving boat and discovered what the driver does in his spare time. Hmmmm.

I made Zac crawl into this thing. Still makes me laugh, especially since he couldn't get out again.

aaaaaaaaaaaaah! Isn't it beautiful.